In my walk of faith, a concept that I often return to is that of discipleship: the intentional process of following Jesus and trying – through the help of the Holy Spirit – to be more like him. 

There is good reason to make this my aim: there are 21 times throughout the Gospels that Jesus says “Follow me,” after all. He says it to the men who become his apostles, and he says it to the crowds who gather to hear him preach; he says it directly, and he says it through metaphor; he says it during his early years of ministry, and he says it post-resurrection. It seems that Jesus wants us to learn from his example, hear and act on his teachings, and imitate his ways more than he wants us to admire him or say good things about him (for all those “Follow me’s” there isn’t a single “worship me”...). 

I recently got to wondering if the same might not be true for Mary, the mother of Jesus. Of course we aren’t following Mary, let alone worshipping her, in the same way that we do Jesus. But would it behoove us, as people seeking virtue and desiring relationship with Jesus, to follow the example of Mary – his mother and his first disciple? Yes, I think it would. 

 With that being said, here are some ways of being that Mary models for us, showing us a path or quiet discipleship. 

Mary Says Yes to God

And Mary said, “Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.” Luke 1:38

Despite lack of certainty, despite not very much information, despite potential ridicule, despite her young age…Mary says yes to God. She doesn’t overthink the Lord’s call, or take time to weigh pros and cons, or consider the cost. She just says yes. 

Mary Praises God

And Mary said, “My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has looked on the humble estate of his servant. For behold, from now on all generations will call me blessed; for he who is mighty has done great things for me, and holy is his name.    Luke 1:46-49

Not only does Mary say yes, but she praises God in the process. Hers is not a begrudging “yes,” but a jubilant one. She knows that, however hard the path before her may be (and we know that it will be hard), God is at work in her life and so she sings a song of praise.

Mary Ponders Before Reaction

“But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.” Luke 2:19

From the moment Jesus was conceived to the time a heavenly host sang to shepherds about his arrival, everything about Mary’s pregnancy, labor, delivery, and postpartum experience was, in a word, extraordinary. Can you even imagine it, really?! One might have expected Mary to be dumbfounded, or to have had a million questions, or at the very least have processed things ad nauseum with Joseph at her side (as my husband can attest, this is what I do when something unusual happens to me!). But no; she simply took it all in and reflected on the happenings in her heart.

Mary Trusts Jesus

When the wine ran out, the mother of Jesus said to him, “They have no wine.” And Jesus said to her, “Woman, what does this have to do with me? My hour has not yet come.” His mother said to the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.” John 2:3-5        

Before Mary has experienced the miracles of Jesus on a personal level, she trusts him. She doesn’t have to witness the extraordinary before knowing that he’s capable of it. In a sense, she’s the counterpart to Thomas the Doubter. She believes before she sees. May we, too, have such faith and trust.         

Mary Shows Up in the Hard Moments

“Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene.” John 19:25 

If there is one thing I wish I could be spared, it is watching the suffering of my children. There is nothing – nothing – that feels worse as a parent than seeing your child suffer, even as it is both inevitable and necessary. But Mary did it, watching the absolute worst kind of suffering: unbearable physical and emotional pain, humiliation, and then death. She showed up in the hardest moment to serve as a witness, as a reminder of love, and as a loving presence ready to attend to her son’s needs in the humble ways she could. 

           
Love Broadly

“When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to his mother, “Woman, behold, your son!” Then he said to the disciple, “Behold, your mother!” And from that hour the disciple took her to his own home.”  John 19:26-27    

Mary's love didn't stop with Jesus, nor did her motherhood. At Jesus' request, Mary took John to be her son, and she takes all of us to be her children. In as much, she is a loving presence, someone we can turn to for support, and a source of wisdom and guidance. As parents, we too can be a loving presence and a source of support and guidance to children beyond our own. Maybe this includes our children's friends; maybe it's the kids in the neighborhood; maybe it's a stranger for whom you purchase Christmas gifts. The point is that discipleship calls us beyond the boundaries of our own nuclear families. 

In Mary's openness to the spirit, in her strong yet humble way of being, and in her persistent faithfulness, Mary is an example of discipleship quite unlike any other. May we follow her example, as a way of following Jesus.